Kissing is a lot like dancing. It’s all about: presence, connection, embodiment and variety. In celebration of International Kissing Day we shared 15 tips inspired by these four key principles. Happy smooching!
Just like with dancing, it all start with consent! Consent from the person who is the fortunate receiving of your kiss, and just as important: self-consent. If in doubt: ask!
PRINCIPLE 1: Approach it with full presence
Being fully present is really the basis for enjoyable kissing experiences, and the following three ideas are well worth investing in.
1) DESTINATION Instead of thinking of kissing as the first essential stop on the road to something else, make the kiss your destination! Kiss for the sake of kissing. There is so much to explore!
Instead of analyzing your experience, listening to your mental chatter or worrying about what’s next, try to trust and follow your intuition. Let your body and the experience lead you.
Close your eyes and focus on your physical experience. Try to notice all the sensations the kiss evokes - not just on your lips and in your mouth but everywhere in your body!
PRINCIPLE 2: Connect with your partner It may sound obvious but most people could still bring their level of connection one or a few levels up…
4) EYE CONTACT
Open your eyes for a moment. Maybe even pull away a bit and just hold each other while you look straight into each other’s eyes. Our eyes can really feel like a window into our soul.
While you try to tune into your sensations and follow your intuition, pay just as much attention to your partner’s body. Try to experience their body as if it’s an extension of your own.
6) FOLLOW OR LEAD
Follow your partner’s body if you enjoy what they are doing, or take the lead to move the experience into a different direction, and notice how they respond.
PRINCIPLE 3: Make it a full body experience
Use all the “tools” your body has been gifted with: your limbs, the way you can move your body, your breathing and your voice.
7) LIMBS Hold their chin. Stroke their cheek. Run your fingers through their hair. Pull their body close to yours. Scratch their back. Curl one of your legs around theirs....
8) MOVEMENTS Move your entire body in sync with the rhythm of your kiss. Rock your hips in sync, grind your pelvises against each other, snake your bodies in a wavelike motion…
Your breathing influences your heart rate and blood flow and thus your mental and physical arousal. Visualize your breath moving your pleasure throughout your whole body.
Follow your impulses to express your pleasure with your voice. Your sounds can turn you both on. Plus it can provide valuable feedback to your partner and boost their confidence.
PRINCIPLE 4: Keep it engaging with variety
Routine doesn’t help with keeping passion alive, so to keep things interesting over time, embrace variety!
11) RHYTHM Vary the rhythm of your movements and breathing. For example: Start slowly to awaken an eagerness. Speed up to drive up arousal. Pause to prolong and deepen.
12) TECHNIQUES Slightly swirl your tongue inside their mouth. Lick their lips or the inside of their mouth. Gently bite their lower lip. Move your tongue as if it's glued together with your partner's.
13) BODY PARTS A strong kiss on the forehead? Little kisses around the collar bone? Some bites in the neck? Licking the ear lopes. Take time to cover any of the nearby spots that might bring pleasure...
14) FLAVOURS From deeply peaceful to wildly passionate, and from seriously significant to silly and playful. Be curious and set the scene for the many different flavours of kisses.
15) BODY POSITIONS
Kissing while… standing up, spooning, lying face to face, one lying on top of the other, one sitting on the other’s lap. Why not make it a quest to discover your favorite kissing postures?
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